Food Service Etiquette and Styles

Service with a smile is more important than which side the food is served from, but it helps to have a server with both the smile and the knowledge!
-Image source, photo of a page in Town and Country Magazine, 2013

Ever since we were shutdown (just for a few weeks to flatten the curve) back in March of 2020, I have received weekly emails and phone calls with the same types of question… “When will you be teaching or giving seminars again?” “When will you be having another tea and talk?” “When will the Olive House be reopened?” I have been giving pretty much the same answer this whole time… “I’m not sure.”

Yes, there was that brief window when I scheduled private group classes, book signings, teas, etc… back in July. Then, I found out I was not only sick, but contagious. I had to cancel everything, including a long planned, talk and Zoom presentation for the Ontario Museum of History and Art. I was crushed and just now am getting better. I am starting to believe classes will be back up and running for October and the museum presentation will, fingers crossed, be in person on November 6th. We’re even hoping to have a tea along with the presentation. I have to follow the heath department rules, however, as does the Olive House, so I have been looking online to see what that will entail.

I was pleased to find this article below on the State Food Safety website. It’s a great article from 2014 on serving food at the table. I get asked about the etiquette for this on a regular basis, but I always have to warn whomever I am speaking with that not all servers are trained in such skills, and there are several different serving styles now in use. Also, most restaurant staff here in the U.S. do not look upon such a job as a career, but as part-time work on the ladder up to something better.   This on Etiquipedia© is an excellent article on varying food service styles, from British Service to Homestyle Service. The new “French Service” has its own article.

I do restaurant and country club staff training, but can’t reach every establishment. And what with many restaurants shuttered permanently, due to this COVID beast we weren’t prepared for, I’m not sure when I will be doing such training again any time soon. The turnover of servers is high and right now, restaurants are desperate for staff. It’s a difficult situation. This article is perfect for the current state of things so I am posting it here for my readers.

Is Left Right?

What side do you serve from?

The correct way to serve food is probably unknown to your customers, but vital to you. This technique requires you place the dishes in front of the customers and take them away from the proper side. Doing so will enhance their overall dining experience.

Chef Albrich, an Austrian-born fine dining expert, suggests that the traditional method of placing dishes from the left and removing them from the right is not always the best way to serve guests. According to him, the custom of serving guests from the left started long ago when food for meals would come out on large trays. Empty plates would be placed in front of guests from the left side, then each one of the plates would be filled with food in their place from the large tray.

“But if you are like most people today and have the plates presented to your guests with the food already on it, nicely displayed and decorated, then it should be served from the right, and it is incorrect to serve it from the left,” Chef Albrich says.

He goes on to outline which foods can be properly delivered from each side of the guest.

Serve from the left

If the place where you work gives its guests empty plates and later fills them at the table, those plates should be given to the customer from the left side. Sides such as vegetables and bread can also be delivered from the left and they should also be removed from the left.

Serve from the right

If the customer’s plate is arranged in the kitchen it should be delivered to them from the right side. Pre-plated food (considering the exceptions above), beverages, all empty plates, and utensils should be served from the guest’s right. All dishes served from the right need to also be removed from the right.

Once again, it is likely that many of your customers won’t know which side is correct when you serve them; however, there is a proper way to serve dishes and you never know when you’ll have a dining expert in your midst! —Jeremy Howard

This post was originally published in November 2014 and has been updated for freshness, accuracy, and comprehensiveness.

Glove History and Etiquette Facts

During the Dark Ages only men wore them. Ladies needed permission from the King to put on gloves. But Catherine di Medici changed all that. Thereafter, gloves became a status symbol among women, with England's Queen Elizabeth I emphasizing her status with more than 2,000 pairs. Today a woman shopping has almost as many kinds, lengths and colors to choose from. And gloves very definitely mark her fashion status.

Do You Have Your Fashion Status Well in Hand?

Choosing a pair of gloves to go with your costume is like selecting a sauce for a very good dish. The wrong choice can spoil everything. Yet ladies can be thankful for such a dilemma because wearing gloves marks their improved position in a man's world. 

During the Dark Ages only men wore them. Ladies needed permission from the King to put on gloves. But Catherine di Medici changed all that. Thereafter, gloves became a status symbol among women, with England's Queen Elizabeth I emphasizing her status with more than 2,000 pairs. Today a woman shopping has almost as many kinds, lengths and colors to choose from. And gloves very definitely mark her fashion status. 

In vogue are sleeveless dresses topped by sleeveless or short-armed jackets or coats, all of which require gloves to make up the fabric deficit. Glove length is described in terms of buttons (a measuring idea the French devised) even though the gloves often may lack buttons altogether. Each button corresponds to an inch measuring from the lowest part of the thumb seam to the cuff of the glove.

Here are the kinds of gloves your accessory wardrobe should Include: 

SHORTY - It stops at the wrist where it may or may not be fastened with a button. The most versatile of all lengths, it looks as well with sleeveless dresses as with long sleeved coats. The trim, style and material determines whether the gloves should be worn with dressy, tailored, day or evening clothes. 

SLIP-ON - Primarily a daytime glove, it has no fastening and ranges from three to five button lengths.

GAUNTLET - It is four to six buttons in length, has a flared cuff, and is pull-on in style. It, too, is primarily a daytime glove.

MOUSQUETAIRE - Lengths range from 8 to 20 buttons and have a buttoned opening on the inner side of the wrist. It is for dressy or formal wear with dresses. 

THE PULL-ONS - The length also range from 8 to 16 buttons. They have no opening or fastening. The elbow length size, about 12 buttons (or longer if worn crushed below the elbow) is the season's most popular length because they take up where cape sleeved, or elbow length, sleeves on new style coats leave off. Longer pull-ons are restricted to evening wear. 

A mere 75 years ago the act of pulling on long gloves was considered to be too intimate to be done in the presence of a gentleman. Today ladies slip them on and off as unblushingly and as casually as hats. Generally speaking, except on formal occasions when a long glove is an integral part of the ensemble, gloves are removed soon after entering a home, theater or restaurant. 

At a party it is not correct to do more than sip from a glass with gloves on. However, etiquette today no longer requires a woman to remove her gloves before shaking hands. — The Sun, 1963 via the Etiquipedia.blogspot. Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Mousquetaire Glove Etiquette and More

The mousquetaire— the glove with an opening at the wrist— is easier to get into and can be rolled back for eating or smoking.— “A woman without gloves is a marked woman. It's like going barefoot to be without them.” - Claire Mc Cardell, 1956

Gloves Called Most Important Costume Accessory – Mid-20th Century Etiquette Advice

“A woman without gloves is a marked woman. It's like going barefoot to be without them.”


Although gloves themselves have changed somewhat since the late Claire Mc Cardell, the designer, made this statement in 1956, the etiquette of wearing gloves has not. They are still the most important accessory of a woman's costume and the one about which there seems to be the most confusion.


Fashion has moved in two opposing directions—extremely casual by day and very formal at night—and it is impossible to be well-dressed without a glove wardrobe that includes various lengths and fabrics.


Long evening dresses have brought the 20-button to 16-button glove back into the forefront of fashion. (“Button,” in glove parlance, means inches measured upward from the base of the thumb.)


White kid is still proper for most evening dresses according to Miss Adelaide Baltimore, glove buyer for Bloomingdale’s. More dramatic women are wearing long black suede gloves with black costumes, and there is some interest in gold lamé or embroidered gloves.


“How long to buy gloves depends on the length of your arms,” Miss Baltimore advised. “With formal dresses the elbow should be covered: this can mean 16-button for some women, longer for others.”


For less formal evening dresses or cocktail dresses, the 10-button to 12-button glove that comes to the elbow is becoming. Wrist-length gloves are sometimes worn at parties by young girls, but the mature woman had better forget them for a while, Miss Baltimore suggested. The “mousquetaire”— the glove with an opening at the wrist— is easier to get into and can be rolled back for eating or smoking.

Gloves for Day

The favorite daytime glove is still the 8-button kid or suede one. Even though all coat sleeves no longer end above the wrist, women like the neat look of sleeve and glove meeting when they move their arms. The silk-lined, kid glove inaugurated in Europe, has made leather gloves easier to slip into and more comfortable. Neutral or black gloves are still daytime favorites, said Miss Baltimore, but her department is selling a surprising number of white kid gloves for day, despite their fragility.


Fabric gloves, now that synthetic fabrics have been given such attractive textures, are practical substitutes for leather and look best in taupe or neutral shades. The long, thick knitted glove, has moved to town along with bulky, country tweeds.


What used to be the driving glove, with a leather palm, is now worn by subway strap hangers and baby-carriage pushers as well as by lady chauffeurs. Cold weather will bring out fur gloves as soft and thick as cats' paws.


American women wear gloves-and keep them on wherever practical. It is correct to wear them while shaking hands, indoors or out. The habit of carrying one glove makes a woman look unfinished. It is a good idea to give oneself a moment before entering a room or a restaurant to replace the glove that came off to pay the taxi driver. — By Angela Taylor, 1963 via the Etiquipedia.blogspot. Etiquette Enthusiast, Maura J. Graber, is the Site Editor for the Etiquipedia© Etiquette Encyclopedia

Etiquette Advice and Tough Love

Sometimes while doing research for the Etiquipedia.blogspot, I peruse old newspapers that I come across. The adverts are always fun to read, along with the “personals” section. I especially enjoy comics and advice for women. It’s a great way to immerse myself in the past and to, for a while at least, forget about the seemingly never ending, 2020 Covid -19 pandemic.

High hem, high heels and high fashion in January of 1929

The other night, I found an especially entertaining newspaper from 1929. The fashion in “Just Among Us Girls” was a vintage blast. As it was in January 1929, and nine months before the famous Wall Street crash, the quip accompanying it was fun and still in good taste. 

The following advice for removing cigarette stains from fingers was interesting. I would have suggested lemon juice, or even vinegar, knowing how well they work with other stains. I guess rubbing alcohol would be out of the question, as this was during Prohibition.

This brief spot below on telephone manners for children, was a nice find. When my kids were little they were continually praised by callers who told me, on more than a few occasions, that they answered the phone more professionally than most people at businesses they called. Being a former telephone operator, I had taught them early how to answer the phone and how to take messages. They knew I took phone manners seriously.

MOTHERS AND THEIR CHILDREN – 

One Mother Says— “I have taught my little girls how to use the telephone. They know they must not shout or speak too low and must listen attentively. I have made them understand that the telephone is not a toy and is only to be used for important calls and conversations. Telephone operators tell me that they have much trouble with children playing with phones and leaving the receivers down or simply wasting their time with foolish calls.” 

The real gem of the bunch was this article below on raising a child with physical handicaps… what we call “physically challenged” today. It’s full of wisdom, common sense, a big helping of tough love and a lot of heart. It is “Guiding Your Child” by Agnes Lyne and well worth the read:

Guiding Your Child

HANDICAPS – To his parents, Dick was the most precious thing in life. When at the age of three he was severely ill with scarlet fever, they watched over him and knew every breath he drew. For days, he hung on the point of death and for many weeks he lay wan and feeble without energy to talk or move. Although before his illness, Dick had already developed a fair vocabulary and was a fine enterprising lad in his play, after it he returned to the ways of his baby days. Slowly he was taught to walk again, and gradually he made friends with his playthings once more. 

But his speech did not come back. He asked for things by crying and pointing, in inarticulate sounds and gestures. He did not respond when spoken to, it seemed as though he had become quite deaf. Appalled by their tragedy, the parents waited on their afflicted baby hand and foot. They watched his expressions and anticipated his wishes. He never had to exert himself to get what he wanted, they rushed to bring it to him at his cry. By the time he was four, his retardation was so marked and his improvement so slight that they took him to a specialist who found that Dick had indeed lost his hearing in one ear, but that there was no other physical handicap. Then a psychologist found that as far as it was possible to judge his intelligence was normal. 

With their new insight and the persistence of their love, his parents decided to make Dick grow up. They left him to get things for himself whenever it was possible. When he grunted and pointed a finger, they said the name of the object he wanted, and not until he had at least made an, effort to repeat the word after them did they let him have it. Slowly he improved. Many a child who has as genuine a handicap as had Dick is injured more by its psychological consequences than by the difficulty itself. Parents need to be on guard, lest the unwise treatment of a handicap becomes more of a drawback than the handicap itself. – By Agnes Lyne, January 1929